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Anger Management

Tuesday, June 06, 2006
So I heard this news report on NPR this morning about "Intermittent Explosive Disorder". I also read a bit more about it online.

I get angry. Often times it's triggered by frustration, but I'll get irrationally angry. It's happened on the road (not usually at other people) but it happens at home, too. It's even happened when I've been thinking about a hypothetical situation. When it happens (and I can see it happening) I lose control and I'll say mean, hurtful things to those I care about. I don't want to - I never want to hurt anyone. But my words (and that's how my anger manifests itself) can be weapons.

I learned years ago to sidestep this. I learned when I could see it coming and I would try, try, TRY to remove myself from the situation. In a car it's hard because you're essentially trapped in there, but outside it should be easy. It's not always possible, though, and I know I've hurt people with words and outbursts that I couldn't control enough or stop. I always hate it. I always regret it. Am I defective?

Part of me hates the idea of a "disorder". It seems like a cop-out, like an excuse. Yet part of me is interested in the research because it seems to match what I experience. If there's something simple that could help me (and therefore help those around me) I'd like to know. I hate hurting people.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

IED: just another reason to get more legal drugs, like prozac.

10:37 PM, June 07, 2006  

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