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Thinking outside the box

Friday, May 26, 2006
So I was reading this article the other day (linked to from Fark.com) about the growing debt the working Americans have to pay to fund the benefits for the upcoming retirement of the baby boomers. This, of course, distresses me 'cause I'm not sure that any money *I* put in will be left for me when my time comes.

Then I remember reading these articles about the bird flu and our nation's panic response to an upcoming pandemic.

Now, an ordinary person would just sit and simmer in panic and desperation. But not this out-of-the-box thinker, dear readers. Where some see fear, I see a problem and a solution, all wrapped up in one. You see, from a purely financial standpoint, it actually makes the most sense to immunize and protect the young and taxpaying. The (strictly financial) solution to an impending retirement crisis is, in short, to reduce the number of retirees needing benefits. For a short term emotional loss, we regain long term financial stability.

Now some readers (like I have more than 3), horrified at my proposal to "off the old folks", must remember that my proposal is only financially motivated and I'm not a) honestly suggesting this or, b) proposing legislation. Keep calm, folks. Don't panic.


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